Pain in the *bleep*

As some of you may know, I’ve been dealing with a lot of pain the past few weeks. I’ve lived with mild pain for a few years now, but lately it’s amped up. I hurt everywhere, especially my back. It’s a curse in our family that goes by the name fibromyalgia. My great grandma had it, my grandma has it, and my Mom has it. Each generation it gets worse and starts earlier…

Although I have yet to be diagnosed by a doc (because I have to go through military docs and they don’t really care how bad you hurt and will only give you motrin until you hurt so bad you yell at them to give you some flippin muscle relaxers or else… ahem… sorry..ranting) I have every symptom and most usually am hurting on the same days that my mom and grandma hurt. We are like human barometers, able to predict a shift in the weather (which has been all sorts of crazy this month). Stress also causes more pain, and what mother isn’t stressed out on a daily basis?

So, we are trying to relieve some stress in our home to help with the pain until I can get my referral so I can go see a doctor who actually knows what the heck he’s doin. My hubby is learning to help out more, and I’m trying not to allow things to bother me quite so much… keyword trying. I learned today that it would be much better for the both of us if instead of getting angry and storming around, that I just talk it out with him. By the end of the day, my muscles ached like I had just done an hour of a Jillian Michael’s exercise routine. Not fun.
My husband made the comment that it would be nice if there were such a thing as vampirism or werewolves, this way I would only have monthly pain instead of daily. (yeah, I turned him into a paranormal fan)

My biggest comfort has been my dog Jasper. He is with me 24/7. He curls up along my spine at night which puts off heat to the sorest spot of my body, he keeps me company while I lay on a bag of ice, and he is always ready for a good cuddle. He is not just my dog anymore, he's a best friend.

Writing helps too. It forces me to sit down and relax my muscles and relieves a lot of stress. Sometimes it can be a little hard to concentrate, but I have been working very hard to learn to work around that. Instead of working for a full hour, I work for 25 minutes and then take a break. This is how I manage my house chores as well. It keeps me calm, focused, and productive, without causing too much pain.

This is another reason my mom is my hero. She works everyday though the pain. Her life has been filled with stress, but she pushes through. I only hope I can adapt as she has.

So if I’m particularly whinny one day, I apologize in advance. I’m still learning to cope. Just tell me to hush up and get to my corner.



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